Same Sex Marriage and Schools

Teachable Moments and Unintended Lessons

As I listen to the debate rage on about whether overturning Proposition 8 will affect our public schools, I’d like to weigh in as an elementary school teacher. I remember a debate I listened to recently between protect marriage’s Chip White and No on 8’s Andrea Jackson.

Prop 8 Debate

One of their discussions was about Rob and Robin Wirthlin, the Massachusetts parents who were told they couldn’t opt out of instruction about gay marriage. Ms. Jackson argued that this case doesn’t apply to California because we have the strongest opt-out laws in the nation, so that parents can always choose what they will allow to be taught to their children. I had to snicker. Ms. Jackson just doesn’t understand the dynamics of the public school classroom.

One of the most powerful tools teachers use are what we call “teachable moments”. These are times during the day when teachers stray from their lesson plans because of a comment, question, or action by a student. THEY HAPPEN ALL THE TIME, especially with younger students. Here are a few examples from my own experience:

1. A boy in my class used the N word. We had a long talk about why we should never discriminate against anyone because of the color of their skin. I even read them the book Martin’s Big Words as a follow-up the next day.

2. A student stole a classmate’s snack and ate it. We had a class discussion about honesty and how it feels when someone steals from you.

3. As I was teaching a reading lesson, we heard a loud clap of thunder outside from a rainstorm. Based on the frightened faces of some of the students, we stopped and talked about thunder and why we don’t have to be afraid of it.

Now, the problem with all these teachable moments is that they catch you off guard. You don’t have time to fall back on a prepared lesson plan; you just open your mouth, and hope you say the right thing. So, what if in the middle of a math lesson, a student asks, “Teacher, I heard about a girl that has two moms. Why doesn’t she have a dad?”

The teacher’s response would vary widely, depending on his/her personal views. Because I feel that discussions of same-sex marriage have no place in school, I personally would respond,

“That’s a good question. Why don’t you go home and ask your parents?”

But, how about a teacher who feels that giving marriage to same-sex couples is an equal rights issue? You might hear a response like this,

“That girl’s family is different than yours, but that doesn’t mean it’s not as good as yours. Her two moms love each other, so they decided to get married. Marriage doesn’t have to just be between a man and a woman. If two ladies love each other, they can get married too.”

Or, from the teacher who feels extremely passionate about same-sex marriage,

“That girl’s mothers are what we call lesbians. They are two women who love each other very much, just like your mom and dad love each other. In California, we are lucky to have laws that let them get married. Kids, I know we were right in the middle of math, but let’s take a break. I want to read you a very important book called, Heather Has Two Mommies.”

Parents, can you see why the whole question of opting out of instruction is really kind of silly? There is no time to send a permission slip home to ask if you can answer a child’s question. That’s why it’s so important to protect Proposition 8. If marriage stays defined as between a man and a woman, then teachers who feel that same-sex marriage is a civil right will be more careful during those teachable moments. But opening the door to same-sex marriage in California is basically opening the mouths of thousands of teachers who already want to teach that homosexuality is just as normal as heterosexuality. Don’t believe it? Ask the teachers you know how they voted on Propostion 8. Don’t expect them to tell you they voted yes. I’m telling you, approving same-sex marriage will have EVERYTHING to do with schools. In case you have forgotten, here are links to articles about two schools that already have decided to extend teachable moments in ways that many parents find inappropriate:

Coming Out Day at Public School

Class Field Trip to Lesbian Wedding

Here’s a great quote from an article by Dr. Laura Haynes . She expresses it much better than I could:

“At present, California curriculum includes units about families,
beginning in kindergarten. The legalization of same-sex marriage opens the
door for children from kindergarten on up to be taught that the state of
California validates that marrying someone of the same sex is as legal and
acceptable an option for them as marrying someone of the opposite sex. How
would this impact required curriculum units such as family, health, values,
child development, sex education, and history? Based on present research
showing that the liberal sexual attitudes in colleges not only allow but actually
elicit homosexuality, we should expect that extending education about liberal
sexual attitudes down through kindergarten will elicit many more of our
children to go down the path of homosexuality. Some parents who have raised
their children in traditional sexual values have been shocked at how much
those values have changed when their children went to public high school or
college. The same effect will begin in kindergarten if same-sex marriage is
allowed to stand in California, and the strong precedent in California will be
used to extend the changes across the U.S.”

Please consider the unintended consequences of approving same-sex marriage. They are real, and they are already happening!

P.S. Thanks to The Journalista Chronicle for pointing me to the Dr. Haynes article!

Defend Traditional Marriage!

The Digital Network Army

For my few dozen regular readers, you know that when Prop 8 passed, I breathed a sigh of relief, and planned to take a few weeks off. Traditional marriage had been protected! But the next day, I found myself back posting, unable to remain silent as our foes protested, intimidated and harrassed anyone who voted Yes on 8. Although many of my fellow Prop 8 bloggers had permanently closed shop, I felt a passionate need to continue to defend traditional marriage, even if I blogged alone. And frankly, after a few weeks, I wondered how long I could continue. Then, a ray of hope – an email from an old friend – the DNA Team Captain!

What is the DNA, you ask? It stands for the Digital Network Army, a group of online supporters of traditional marriage who agreed to work in unison to defend this sacred institution. During the height of the Prop 8 battle, we received daily emails from our captain, and we, the soldiers, blogged, rated youtube videos, commented on news stories, and did whatever else possible to make our voices heard. But, like others wearied in the battle to defend traditional marriage, the captain also decided to call it quits after the election. I received the final email on November 6th, and I assumed the DNA was dead.

So you can imagine my joy when two weeks later I received this email from our team captain:

Dear DNA,

I have received numerous emails from people who tell me the fight for traditional marriage has just begun and we shouldn’t stop our efforts now! And, well . . . they’re right! What was once a heated discussion here in California has spread like wildfire all around the United States and across the world. Even here in California, the discussion is far from settled. People everywhere are deciding which side of the fence they belong to, and we need to be anxiously engaged in helping traditional marriage remain the calm and settled standard across America.

So – we have decided to resurrect the DNA. Will you continue to stand with us? Will you help us stand up for our nation and continue to stand up for your state? We need your help! Just as California has gone through the fire, so will Connecticut and soon New York.

As you are well aware, gay activists are frenzied! They continue to scream vehemently on the Internet and in the media, and they will not consider any view except a complete acceptance of same-sex marriage.

The format of the DNA, however, is going to change somewhat. For example, the “Team Captain” will not be a particular person. Rather, the burden will be shared by several people. I will be stepping down as the permanent team captain and handing over the reigns to a new Team Captain for his/her shift. Each Team Captain may have a slightly different tone and strategy – but the goal will always be the same: to mobilize the DNA troops and, working together, make an incredible difference in this battle to preserve traditional marriage.

I will formally ask each Team Captain to preserve the DNA’s strong values of respect and kindness towards ALL people – including thosewho are screaming at us. I ask the same of each of you.

Thank you for continued support of this great cause! We have worked a miracle in California, and we can do it again. And we must! Grab your helm, and let’s get busy!

Sincerely,

Old Team Captain

The DNA is back in business! And now, we have a team of captains, each taking turns leading the troops. I for one am excited and honored to continue the work of defending traditional marriage. How about you? Are you ready and willing to stand up for this sacred institution? Join now and do your part! Let’s protect traditional marriage!

JOIN THE DIGITAL NETWORK ARMY – DEFEND TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE

Another Teacher Annoyed by the Liberal CTA

Read this great post from blogger Darren (Right on the Left Coast) about a teacher who planned on voting against Proposition 8, but still questioned the CTA’s waste of a million dollars. Then, please continue reading Darren’s other posts about the CTA, and you’ll begin to understand why conservative teachers are so disgusted with this biased organization. Thanks, Darren, for the great info!

eHarmony Caves to Gay Activist Pressure

In another instance of gay activist bullying, online dating service eharmony.com has agreed to create a new website, “Compatible Partners”, exclusively for gay and lesbian users. To quote blogger Scott Hong’s hilarious post, Militant Heterosexuals Sue Gay.com,

“Never mind that [eharmony] was started in order to provide long-lasting relationships based on Christian values – heterosexual only, for the purposes of marriage (not casual flings).”

For indepth information and commentary, also read this great post by blogger I Vote Yes, Gay Rights Activists Infiltrate eHarmony

CTA – Why Am I Giving You My Money?

Other than the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Center, who was the largest institutional donor to the No on 8 campaign? The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force? The Gay and Lesbian Alliance? Equality California? Nope. The winner was: THE CALIFORNIA TEACHERS ASSOCIATION, donating a total of $1,316,974 in their attempt to defeat Proposition 8. Why, you ask, did the CTA spend so much money on something that had nothing to do with schools? We teachers asked the same question. Here are two of my favorite youtube responses by California teachers:

Well, two weeks after the election, new details are emerging about the CTA’s involvement with Proposition 8. Read this post by Beetle Blogger about a high school student who took a stand, and the shocking email response from a CTA Board member: CTA Student Smack Down

But wait, it gets worse! Mid-October, I received a letter from the CTA about a new “voluntary” political contribution program. This is how the program worked – current CTA members like me had until November 1st to opt out, or CTA would assume permission to begin deducting an additional $20 of dues per year! Perhaps the CTA political coffers were getting low? Gee, I wonder where all the money went? Well, as a Proposition 8 grassroots volunteer, I was a little busy in October, so I let the opt-out deadline come and go. Last week, I emailed CTA asking how to get my $20 back. Here’s my correspondence with the CTA:

Me: “I received information in the middle of October about the $20 Voluntary Contribution to support CTA Advocacy efforts. I missed the deadline to opt out. Does that mean that I can never opt out, not even for next school year? That seems unfair.

CTA: “You will be able to opt out during the opt out window next year as well.”

Me: “When is next year’s opt out window?”

CTA: “The window will be open September to November 1 next year. Thanks.”

So, first they take my $20 with a two-week window for me to get it back. Then they tell me if I want the $20 they’re going to steal next year, I have to wait until September to ask for it? AAAAAH!